Weekly Notes: 2/52

This entire week went in a blur. Infact, on Wednesday/Thursday, I did catch myself confused about the status of these weekly notes because I knew a lot wouldn’t have been achieved worth writing about.

But a life was lived and it deserves a mark.

1. On Sunday, during the time when Orbit was getting her wash done, I went to catch the exhibition of the books of Kohei Sugiura. I was utterly disappointed because nothing could be touched! Imagine hundreds of books laid out in front of you designed by one of the most prolific designers and you can’t flip a page. It was crowded but surreal because people were craning their necks to look around the books to catch a glimpse of inspiration but I could see that everyone was disappointed.
   Luckily, I was present there on Friday when the exhibit opened and was able to flip a few magazines over before taking the wrong decision to come back later for a more peaceful preview.

2. At Anomalie Tattoo Co, I’ve decided to use this year to be intentionally present at events so a couple of days were spent in talking to some upcoming events and adding our new designs to the website. Everyday, I discover atleast 2-3 new things we can be doing with Anomalie Tattoo Co and discovering about it just lifts my spirits. I think this is what happens when your soul is aligned with the work you do and I consider myself lucked out that I am getting to build this little brand.

3. Paras’s parents arrived in the middle of the week and we took them to Toast and Tonic, a place that I’ve grown to enjoy not only for their drinks but also for their food. His mom doesn’t like cocktails a lot but she thoroughly relished the Herbalist - one of their signature drinks.

4. On Friday, we left for Coorg for a two-night stay with them and I am typing this weekly note from Coorg. This entire week, I had troubled sleep paired with pains and aches sprouting from random places and somehow I have managed to catch up on my sleep. I do need to go for a full body test once I am back in Bangalore because I feel bloated and not super energetic.

5. While in Coorg, I unfolded the inner immature flower-spotter in me and whipped out my favourite app to identify flowers. Here are a few of the species I saw.

This was this week and hope that the pace picks up a little next week.

Weekly Notes: 1/52

The first week of the year flew by quicker than one could blink. This year, it is one of my deep wishes for myself to take focus away from the instant updates on social platforms and direct that energy into filling the pages of my blog. Just like the old days :)

I spent the last week of 2024 in Goa with friends and it seemed like a lesson in Murphy’s laws - tilting towards the bad side. Everyone got the flu and I had a panic/anxiety/heartburn because of all the lack of sleep and black coffee consumption. So I have stepped into the new year a little wiser for limiting my coffee intake specially when I am sleep deprived.

1. I have been reading The Other Side - a documentation and revealing of artists that leaned into their spirituality to create art. I have been making meditation drawings for over five years now. Something that I started making at a low point in life and have always assumed them to be non publishable pieces. The drawings are tiny to begin with and with no text around them, hard to understand by anyone other than me. This book gives me courage to continue my practice.

2. On the 1st January, while we were taking our flight back to Bangalore with problematic throats and cold, Nishita hosted her friends at home for an art party and they played around with an Anomalie tattoo she designed. It always feels nice to see people wearing these tattoos. Watching people look at a design and feel that it is a part of their identity gives me goosebumps!

Nishita’s friends sporting the tattoo she designed. You can get the tattoo here —> https://www.anomalietattoo.com/products/brown-kudi-temporary-tattoo

3. I came home to a pending list of dispatches I had to do for our upcoming collab with the Kairo Store - a brand whose tees I have really liked and we made a cute little postcard to send along our tattoos.

4. Visited an exhibit by Prof Kohei Sugiura where almost 100 of his designed books were on display with Noopur and Rasagy. The exhibit was so full that all of us decided to revisit it to actually enjoy seeing the books properly.

Noopur, Rasagy, Kenneth and Garima came home and we chatted and ate idlis and chikkis. Noopur gifted me the cutest hand made sweater, this graphic novel and a postcard and Garima and Rasagy gave a little working camera that fits in my palm. I have been blessed with friends who take so much time and effort to think of the most beautiful gifts and I do feel I need to make a zine of all the little gifts I keep receiving.

5. Started working on a book illustration project that I need to complete by this month and when I printed the existing illustrations, I figured that the readability was an issue so I need to redo everything I’ve done so far!

6. In the evening, Niramayee came over to hand deliver my belated most thoughtful birthday gifts (which featured this graphic novel) and by that point, I was just reflecting on all the good energy of this tribe around me. There’s something about sitting with classmates that lights a warm glowy bulb inside one’s head. The laughter comes so naturally and easily :) Oh, Rashmi brought flowers to the mix!

Ending the weekly notes with these are two sunsets. One is 31 December, 2024 and the second is 4 January, 2025

Books I read in 2024

This was a good year for reading despite me meeting my targets halfway. On the eve of 31st December, 2023, I had decided (with video proof) that I will read 80 books this year. 1.5 books a week seemed doable on that night.

With the launch of my studio in April, books took a backseat with a few being unfinished. I don’t regret keeping a lofty target though. The target enabled me to keep ploughing through reading and while I failed, I did read more books than last year. For this purpose, I’ll recommend a reading target to everyone!

Here are little blurbs of the books I read and loved this year. Hope you had a great reading year this year and will manage more diverse books in 2025.

1. "How to Understand Israel in 60 Days or Less" is Sarah Glidden's graphic memoir documenting her Birthright Israel trip - a free program that offers young Jewish adults their first organized visit to Israel. In the book, Glidden chronicles her journey as a politically progressive, skeptical young Jewish American woman grappling with her preconceptions about Israel and the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

Through watercolor illustrations and honest narrative, Glidden captures her internal struggle as her established views are challenged by direct experiences in the country. She arrives with a pro-Palestinian perspective and finds herself confronting more complex realities than she anticipated. The memoir doesn't aim to provide definitive answers about the conflict, but rather illustrates the author's personal journey of realizing that understanding Israel is far more complicated than she initially thought.

The book stands out for its nuanced approach to a contentious topic, using the personal narrative format to explore larger questions about nationalism, identity, and the challenge of reconciling different historical narratives. Glidden's artwork and storytelling work together to convey both the physical journey through Israel and her emotional journey of questioning her own beliefs and assumptions.

2. "It's Lonely at the Centre of the Earth" is Zoe Thorogood's raw and deeply personal autobiographical graphic novel covering six months of her life as a young comic artist struggling with mental health, creative pressure, and personal identity. The book, created between the ages of 24 and 25, uses multiple art styles and innovative storytelling techniques to explore Thorogood's inner world.

The memoir is particularly notable for its meta approach - Thorogood depicts multiple versions of herself, including past and future selves, often in conversation with each other. She experiments with different visual representations of her emotional states, mixing realistic and symbolic imagery to convey her experiences with depression, suicidal thoughts, and artistic ambition.

Through brutally honest self-examination and dark humor, Thorogood grapples with questions of artistic worth, mortality, and the challenge of creating autobiographical work while living it. The title itself references both her feelings of isolation and her tendency to place herself at the center of her own narrative - a self-awareness that adds another layer of complexity to the work.

The book stands out for its innovative approach to mental health representation in comics, using the medium's unique properties to visualize internal struggles in ways that text alone couldn't achieve. Despite its heavy themes, Thorogood's sharp wit and artistic virtuosity make the work both accessible and profoundly moving, earning it significant critical acclaim in the comics community.

3. "Hitler" by Shigeru Mizuki is a unique biographical manga that examines Adolf Hitler's life from his childhood through his rise to power and eventual downfall. What sets this work apart is Mizuki's distinctive approach - he combines his signature cartooning style (used primarily for Hitler as a character) with hyper-realistic backgrounds and historical scenes, creating a striking visual contrast that emphasizes both the human and monstrous aspects of his subject.

The book is particularly notable for its Japanese perspective on Western history. Mizuki, who lost an arm and many of his friends in World War II, brings his personal experience with war and fascism to bear on the narrative. Rather than simply demonizing Hitler, he attempts to understand how an unremarkable person could transform into history's most notorious dictator, while never excusing or minimizing the horror of his actions.

Mizuki's work stands out for its historical detail and psychological complexity. He meticulously researches and depicts key moments in Hitler's life, from his failed artistic aspirations in Vienna to his experiences in World War I, while exploring the social and political conditions that enabled his rise to power. The manga format allows Mizuki to shift between intimate personal moments and sweeping historical events, creating a comprehensive portrait that is both historically informative and emotionally engaging.

This is both a powerful historical document and a warning about how ordinary human weaknesses can transform into extraordinary evil under the right circumstances. Mizuki's perspective as someone who lived through the war on the Axis side adds a unique dimension to this crucial historical narrative.

4. "A Slap in the Face" by Abbas Khider is a powerful, darkly humorous novel that follows Karim Mensy, an Iraqi refugee in Germany, as he decides to deliver one final message to his immigration case worker: a symbolic slap in the face. Through this frame narrative, Khider crafts a biting critique of the German bureaucratic system and its treatment of refugees.

The novel stands out for its innovative structure - written as a long monologue addressed to the case worker, Karim recounts his journey from Iraq to Germany, his struggles with the byzantine asylum process, and the soul-crushing experience of living in limbo. Khider draws from his own experiences as an Iraqi refugee in Germany to paint a vivid picture of the psychological toll of displacement and bureaucratic dehumanization.

What makes the work particularly compelling is its balance of humor and tragedy. Despite the serious subject matter, Khider infuses the narrative with absurdist comedy that highlights the often kafka-esque nature of the immigration system. The titular slap becomes both a gesture of frustration and an act of reclaiming dignity in the face of a system that reduces human beings to paperwork.

Through Karim's story, Khider challenges readers to confront uncomfortable truths about immigration policies while maintaining a deeply human perspective on the refugee experience. The novel serves as both a literary work and a powerful commentary on contemporary European immigration politics.

5. "Moms" by Yeong-shin Ma is a groundbreaking graphic novel that shatters stereotypes about middle-aged women through its raw, honest portrayal of three Korean women in their fifties navigating love, work, and desire. Based on Ma's own mother's experiences and those of her friends, the book follows these women as they juggle factory jobs, complex relationships with younger men, family obligations, and their own pursuit of happiness in contemporary Seoul.

What makes this work remarkable is its refusal to treat its protagonists as traditional maternal figures. Instead, Ma presents them as fully realized individuals dealing with financial pressures, workplace discrimination, sexual desire, and the challenges of dating in middle age. The women drink, dance, fight, love, and make mistakes, defying social expectations about how "mothers" should behave.

The stark black and white artwork complements the unflinching narrative, creating an intimate portrait of lives rarely centered in graphic literature. Ma's decision to base the story on real experiences of working-class women adds an extra layer of authenticity and urgency to the work. Through these characters, he examines broader themes of class, gender, and aging in modern Korean society.

"Moms" stands out for treating its middle-aged female protagonists with the same depth and complexity usually reserved for younger characters, while offering a unique window into contemporary Korean society from a perspective rarely seen in Western literature.

6. "Simple Passion" by Annie Ernaux is a spare, unflinching autobiographical work that documents the author's all-consuming affair with a married foreign diplomat. Written with Ernaux's characteristic blend of clinical detachment and raw emotional intensity, the novel examines how passionate love can reduce a self-possessed intellectual woman to a state of complete dependency and obsession.

What makes this work extraordinary is Ernaux's ability to dissect her own behavior with anthropological precision while still conveying the overwhelming nature of desire. She describes waiting for his calls, choosing clothes he might like, shopping for food he prefers - all while maintaining an almost scientific distance from these actions. Through this lens, she transforms a personal experience into a broader examination of how passion can both elevate and devastate.

The book is particularly notable for its rejection of romantic clichés. Instead of glorifying or condemning the affair, Ernaux presents it as both a form of transcendence and a kind of madness. Her stark, unadorned prose style serves to heighten rather than cool the emotional temperature of the work, creating a paradoxical sense of controlled frenzy.

By stripping away literary artifice and social judgment, Ernaux creates a universal story about the nature of obsessive love while simultaneously examining how gender, class, and power shape our most intimate experiences. The result is a work that is both deeply personal and profoundly political, cementing Ernaux's reputation as a master of autobiographical writing.

7. "Wendy: Master of Art" by Walter Scott is a hilarious and painfully accurate satire of the contemporary art world, following the misadventures of Wendy as she pursues her MFA at the University of Hell (in Ontario). Through his distinctive, sketchy art style and razor-sharp wit, Scott captures the absurdity, pretension, and genuine struggles of art school life.

The book brilliantly skewers everything from obtuse artist statements to studio visit anxiety, while Wendy stumbles through critiques, navigates complicated relationships, and tries to figure out what kind of artist she wants to be. Scott's protagonist is endearingly flawed - procrastinating, drinking too much, making questionable decisions - while remaining relatable to anyone who's ever felt like an impostor in academia or the art world.

What makes this work particularly compelling is how it balances its satirical elements with genuine insight into the creative process and personal growth. While Scott mercilessly mocks the pretensions of the art world, he also acknowledges the real vulnerability and soul-searching involved in artistic development. Wendy's struggles with imposter syndrome, creative blocks, and the pressure to theoretically justify her work will resonate with anyone who's pursued a creative field.

Through Wendy's journey, Scott creates both a clever critique of institutional art education and a touching story about finding one's artistic voice amidst the chaos of graduate school. The result is a graphic novel that works both as social satire and as a relatable coming-of-age story set in the contemporary art world.

8. "Great Japanese Stories" edited by Jay Rubin is a foundational anthology that brings together some of the most significant short works from Japan's literary canon. The collection spans multiple periods and styles, offering readers a comprehensive introduction to the depth and breadth of Japanese short fiction.

From the psychological complexity of Akutagawa Ryūnosuke to the subtle social observations of Kawabata Yasunari, the anthology showcases how Japanese writers have mastered the art of the short story. Each tale demonstrates distinct aspects of Japanese literary tradition, from the aesthetic principle of "mono no aware" (the pathos of things) to modernist explorations of identity and alienation.

What makes this collection particularly valuable is its careful curation and translation, which preserves both the cultural nuances and the literary power of the original works. The stories range from classical tales steeped in traditional Japanese aesthetics to more contemporary narratives that grapple with Japan's modernization and its impact on society.

The anthology serves as both an excellent introduction for newcomers to Japanese literature and a valuable reference for those already familiar with the field. Through these carefully selected stories, readers gain insight into not only Japan's literary evolution but also its cultural values, social changes, and philosophical perspectives across different historical periods.

9. "The Power of the Powerless" (1978) is one of Václav Havel's most influential essays, written while he was a dissident in communist Czechoslovakia. The essay explores how ordinary citizens can resist totalitarian systems through what he calls "living in truth" - refusing to participate in the rituals and lies that sustain authoritarian power.

Havel uses the famous example of a greengrocer who displays a communist slogan in his shop window not because he believes in it, but because it's expected and easier than refusing. Through this metaphor, he illustrates how people become complicit in their own oppression by participating in what he calls "the panorama of everyday life." The essay argues that when individuals choose to stop participating in these small acts of compliance, they create cracks in the system's facade.

The essay is particularly notable for showing how power operates not just through obvious forms of repression, but through the creation of a complex system of social rituals and behaviors that citizens tacitly agree to perform. By breaking these unwritten rules - by "living in truth" - individuals can reclaim their dignity and create space for genuine civil society.

The text became incredibly influential in Eastern European dissident movements and continues to resonate with democracy advocates worldwide. It offers insights into how seemingly powerless individuals can challenge entrenched systems not through direct confrontation, but through authentic living and refusing to participate in lies.

10. "Waiting" (2021) is a graphic memoir by Keum Suk Gendry-Kim that depicts her mother's experience of family separation during the Korean War. The book tells the heartbreaking story of how her mother was separated from her young son during the chaos of the war and her decades-long wait to reunite with him, set against the broader historical context of divided families between North and South Korea.

The memoir weaves together multiple timelines, moving between the author's contemporary efforts to help her aging mother search for her lost son and flashbacks to the war period that show how the separation occurred. Through stark black-and-white illustrations, Gendry-Kim captures both intimate family moments and the larger devastation of the war, exploring how political divisions created deeply personal tragedies.

The book powerfully illustrates the ongoing human cost of the Korean Peninsula's division, showing how the pain of separation continues to affect families generations later. Gendry-Kim's artistic style, which draws on traditional Korean ink painting techniques, adds emotional depth to the narrative while connecting it to Korean cultural traditions.

11. "The Loneliness of the Long-Distance Cartoonist" (2020) is Adrian Tomine's autobiographical graphic memoir that chronicles his life in comics with equal parts self-deprecation and vulnerability. Styled like a personal diary or sketchbook, the book presents a series of awkward, embarrassing, and sometimes painful moments from Tomine's career as a cartoonist - from his early days as a teenage comic creator to his established years as a New Yorker cover artist.

The memoir is particularly striking in how it captures the disconnect between public recognition and private insecurity. Tomine details mortifying moments at comic conventions, poorly attended book signings, harsh reviews, and cringe-worthy social interactions, all while his career is ostensibly on the rise. These vignettes are rendered in his characteristically clean, precise style, but presented as if sketched in a private notebook, creating an intimate reading experience.

The book takes an emotional turn when, at the height of his career, Tomine faces a health crisis that forces him to confront his mortality and reassess his priorities. This shift transforms what begins as a series of comedic self-deprecating anecdotes into a deeper meditation on what truly matters in life - particularly his relationship with his wife and children.

Through his unflinching honesty about his own neuroses and anxieties, Tomine creates a work that speaks to anyone who has felt like an outsider or struggled with the gap between professional success and personal fulfillment. The title, playing off Alan Sillitoe's "The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner," perfectly captures the solitary nature of the cartoonist's craft and the isolation that can come with pursuing any creative endeavor.

12. "This Country" (2023) is a debut graphic memoir that explores the author's complex relationship with their Iranian-American identity through the lens of a road trip. Following a period of personal crisis, Mahdavian undertakes a journey across America, interweaving their immediate experiences with memories of growing up as the child of Iranian immigrants in post-9/11 America.

The book is particularly striking in how it uses the visual language of comics to capture both physical and emotional landscapes. Mahdavian's art style shifts between detailed architectural renderings of American spaces and more experimental, abstract sequences that convey internal states of displacement and belonging. The narrative moves fluidly between past and present, examining how national and personal traumas echo across generations.

Through their cross-country journey, Mahdavian explores questions of home, belonging, and identity formation in a nation often hostile to Middle Eastern immigrants and their children. The memoir is especially powerful in its exploration of queer identity within the context of both Iranian and American cultures, and how the author navigates these intersecting aspects of self.

13. "About Women: Conversations Between a Writer and a Painter" (2015) is a unique dual memoir capturing an extended dialogue between writer Lisa Alther and artist Françoise Gilot. Over the course of several years, these two accomplished women - from different generations and cultural backgrounds - engage in wide-ranging conversations about their lives, art, and experiences as women in the 20th century.

The book is particularly fascinating for how it juxtaposes their distinct perspectives: Gilot, the French-born painter known partly for her relationship with Pablo Picasso but more importantly for her own significant artistic career, and Alther, the American novelist who came of age during the feminist movement of the 1960s. Their conversations cover everything from their childhoods (Gilot's in pre-war Paris, Alther's in the American South) to their artistic development, relationships, motherhood, and their observations about how women's roles have evolved over their lifetimes.

What makes the book compelling is how these two artists, despite their different backgrounds, find common ground in their experiences as women pursuing creative careers while navigating societal expectations. Their dialogue reveals both the universal aspects of women's experiences and how these experiences are shaped by specific cultural and historical contexts. The result is an intimate portrait of two lives that also serves as a broader meditation on art, feminism, and the changing position of women in society.

14. "The Days at the Morisaki Bookshop" (2023, English translation) by Satoshi Yagisawa is a gentle, contemplative novel that follows Takako, a young woman who seeks refuge at her uncle's tiny secondhand bookstore in Tokyo after a devastating breakup. The Morisaki Bookshop, tucked away in a quiet corner of Jimbocho - Tokyo's famous book district - becomes both her sanctuary and the catalyst for her personal transformation.

The novel excels in its intimate portrayal of the healing power of books and the unique atmosphere of Japanese bookshops. Through Takako's gradual immersion in the daily rhythms of the bookstore, Yagisawa captures the meditative quality of arranging books, interacting with regular customers, and discovering forgotten literary treasures. Her uncle's quiet wisdom and the shop's eccentric regulars help Takako rediscover her sense of self and purpose.

What makes the book particularly compelling is how it weaves Japanese literary references throughout the narrative, creating a love letter to books themselves while exploring themes of family, recovery, and finding one's place in the world. The bookshop itself becomes a character, with its cramped aisles and carefully curated collection serving as a metaphor for life's hidden possibilities.

Like many Japanese novels centered on small shops and quiet lives, "The Days at the Morisaki Bookshop" finds profound meaning in everyday moments and celebrates the subtle ways human connections can transform us.

15. "The Yellow Book: A Traveller's Diary" (2023) by Amitava Kumar is a genre-defying work that blends memoir, art, and meditation on contemporary life. Born from Kumar's practice of creating a watercolor painting each day during the pandemic, the book expands into a broader exploration of travel, politics, literature, and the act of bearing witness in our current moment.

The book takes its name from the author's yellow Moleskine notebooks, where he combines his paintings with written observations, creating a unique visual and textual diary. Kumar moves between continents and contexts, from his hometown in India to his adopted home in America, documenting everything from political protests to intimate family moments, climate change to COVID-19.

What makes the work particularly striking is how it questions the traditional boundaries between art forms. Kumar's watercolors - sometimes beautiful, sometimes deliberately crude - interact with his written observations to create a new kind of storytelling. The book becomes a meditation on how we record and process our experiences in an age of global crisis, and how art might serve as both documentation and survival strategy.

Through this hybrid form, Kumar explores what it means to be a writer and artist in a world of borders, surveillance, and increasing political tension, while also capturing the small moments of beauty and connection that persist despite these challenges.

16. "What My Bones Know" by Stephanie Foo is a powerful memoir that explores complex PTSD through the lens of both personal narrative and scientific investigation. As a successful radio producer who worked on "This American Life," Foo brings her journalistic skills to bear on understanding her own diagnosis of C-PTSD, which stemmed from childhood abuse and abandonment by both parents.

The memoir stands out for how it weaves together multiple threads: Foo's personal journey through trauma and healing, her investigation into the science and treatment of C-PTSD, and her exploration of intergenerational trauma in the context of her Malaysian Chinese family history. She approaches her subject with both emotional vulnerability and journalistic rigor, consulting experts, examining research, and interrogating how trauma manifests differently in Asian American communities.

What makes the book particularly compelling is Foo's ability to articulate the often invisible ways trauma reshapes both mind and body. She writes with clarity about navigating the American mental health system, the specific challenges of finding culturally competent care, and the complex process of healing from childhood trauma. The title itself speaks to how trauma lives in the body - a knowledge deeper than memory or conscious thought.

Through her unflinching examination of her own experience, Foo creates both a memoir of healing and a resource for others struggling with C-PTSD, while also offering a broader critique of how mental health care often fails to account for cultural differences and intergenerational trauma.

17. "Baby on the Fire Escape: Creativity, Motherhood, and the Mind-Baby Problem" by Julie Phillips is a fascinating exploration of how women artists and writers have navigated the competing demands of creative work and motherhood. Through detailed portraits of creative figures like Ursula K. Le Guin, Alice Neel, Audre Lorde, and others, Phillips examines the various strategies, compromises, and innovations these artists developed to maintain their artistic practice while raising children.

The book's title comes from Alice Neel, who would sometimes place her baby on the fire escape while she painted - an image that captures both the desperation and ingenuity of artists seeking to carve out creative space within the constraints of motherhood. Phillips delves deep into her subjects' lives, examining their daily routines, support systems, financial struggles, and the ways their experiences of motherhood both challenged and enriched their art.

What makes the book particularly compelling is how it moves beyond simple narratives of sacrifice or balance to examine the complex ways motherhood and creativity intersect. Phillips shows how these artists' experiences of motherhood often influenced their work in profound ways, while also acknowledging the very real obstacles and conflicts they faced. She examines how race, class, and historical context shaped these women's different approaches to combining art and motherhood.

The book serves as both a cultural history and a meditation on larger questions about creativity, gender, and the persistent challenges of reconciling artistic ambition with the demands of caregiving. Through these women's stories, Phillips challenges conventional wisdom about artistic genius and isolation, suggesting new ways of thinking about the relationship between creative work and family life.

18. "What is Home, Mum?" by Sabba Khan is a striking graphic memoir that explores the complexities of being a second-generation Kashmiri migrant in East London. Through bold black-and-white artwork and innovative page layouts, Khan examines the intergenerational impact of Partition, the challenges of navigating between British and Muslim identities, and the ways migration stories echo through families.

The memoir is particularly powerful in how it visualizes abstract concepts like belonging and displacement. Khan uses architectural drawings - reflecting her training as an architect - to explore literal and metaphorical spaces of home, mixing these with more experimental visual techniques to capture emotional and cultural dynamics. The conversations between Khan and her mother serve as the heart of the book, revealing how differently two generations understand concepts of home, duty, and identity.

What makes the work unique is how it addresses both deeply personal experiences - including the challenges of wearing hijab, family expectations around marriage, and cultural pressures - while connecting these to broader historical and social contexts. Khan's architectural background influences both her visual style and her thematic exploration of how physical spaces shape our sense of identity and belonging.

Through this intimate family story, Khan creates a broader meditation on contemporary British Muslim identity, intergenerational trauma, and the ongoing impact of colonial history on present-day lives. The book offers a fresh perspective on the British migrant experience while pushing the boundaries of what autobiographical comics can achieve.

19. "Upstream" is a luminous collection of essays by Mary Oliver that weaves together her observations of nature with reflections on the creative life. Drawing from a lifetime of walking and observing in the woods, Oliver explores how the natural world has shaped both her poetry and her understanding of what it means to live with attention and purpose.

The collection takes its name from Oliver's instinct to walk upstream, against the current - both literally in her wanderings and metaphorically in her approach to life and art. Through essays that range from intimate encounters with wildlife to meditations on literary influences like Whitman and Emerson, Oliver examines what it means to find one's true path and follow it despite societal pressures to conform.

What makes the book particularly striking is how Oliver connects her close observations of natural phenomena - a fox hunting in winter, the architecture of spider webs, the patient work of pond-building beavers - to larger questions about creativity, purpose, and belonging. Her prose demonstrates the same precision and grace that characterizes her poetry, finding profound meaning in the minute details of the natural world.

The collection serves as both a memoir of her development as a writer and a guide to living a life of greater awareness and intention. Through Oliver's eyes, we learn to see the extraordinary in the ordinary, and to understand how deep attention to the world around us can lead to both artistic creation and personal transformation.

20. "Breasts and Eggs" by Mieko Kawakami is a bold, feminist novel that unfolds in two interconnected parts, both centered on the life of Natsuko, a writer living in Tokyo. The first section follows her reunion with her sister Makiko, who's obsessed with getting breast enhancement surgery, and Makiko's daughter Midoriko, who's stopped speaking due to her anxiety about puberty and her changing body.

The novel's second half expands its scope to explore Natsuko's contemplation of single motherhood through sperm donation, a decision that forces her to confront Japan's deeply conservative attitudes toward non-traditional families. Through these intertwining narratives, Kawakami examines women's relationships with their bodies, reproductive rights, class divisions in contemporary Japan, and the various pressures women face in a patriarchal society.

What makes the book particularly striking is Kawakami's unflinching prose style, which combines raw honesty about bodily experiences with philosophical depth. She moves seamlessly between the intimate physical details of women's lives and larger questions about bodily autonomy, reproduction, and what it means to be a woman in contemporary Japan.

The novel stands out for how it tackles traditionally taboo subjects in Japanese literature while maintaining a deeply human core. Through its exploration of bodies, class, and choice, "Breasts and Eggs" offers a powerful meditation on gender, agency, and the various ways women navigate societal expectations while trying to maintain control over their own lives.

21. "The Boxer" by Reinhard Kleist adapts Harry Haft's memoir, telling the harrowing story of a Jewish boxer who survived Auschwitz by fighting fellow prisoners for the entertainment of SS officers. The graphic novel powerfully depicts how Haft endured this moral nightmare - where defeat meant death for his opponents - driven by his determination to survive and reunite with his first love.

The book is particularly striking in how it follows Haft's post-war life in America, where he pursued a professional boxing career culminating in a fight with future heavyweight champion Rocky Marciano. Kleist's stark black-and-white artwork captures both the brutality of the concentration camp matches and the psychological toll that haunted Haft throughout his life.

What makes the work especially powerful is how it examines survival guilt and trauma's lasting impact. Through Haft's story, Kleist explores the impossible choices people made to survive the Holocaust and how they lived with those decisions afterward. The book becomes not just a Holocaust narrative or a boxing story, but a complex meditation on survival, memory, and the price of staying alive.

Through its unflinching examination of moral compromise and resilience, "The Boxer" offers a unique perspective on both the Holocaust and its long aftermath, showing how trauma reverberates through a life long after the immediate danger has passed.

22. "Mottled Dawn" (English collection) presents selected partition stories by Saadat Hasan Manto, one of South Asia's most significant and controversial short story writers. The collection captures the savage absurdity and human cost of the 1947 Partition of India through Manto's characteristically unflinching prose and dark humor.

The stories are particularly powerful for how they avoid political commentary in favor of revealing the intimate horrors of sectarian violence and displacement. Manto focuses on ordinary people caught in extraordinary circumstances - communal riots, refugee camps, border crossings - while refusing to moralize or take sides. Instead, he presents human brutality and vulnerability with an almost clinical detachment that makes the stories even more devastating.

What makes the collection exceptional is Manto's ability to capture both the immediate violence of Partition and its psychological aftermath. His most famous story "Toba Tek Singh" uses the inmates of a mental asylum to represent the absurdity of drawing borders through a shared homeland, while pieces like "Thanda Gosht" (Cold Meat) and "Khol Do" (Open It) confront the sexual violence that characterized the period with shocking directness.

Through these unsparing portraits of humanity at its worst and most vulnerable, Manto creates a testament to how political decisions tear through individual lives. His work remains startlingly relevant to contemporary discussions about nationalism, communal violence, and the human cost of drawing borders through communities.

23. "Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982" by Cho Nam-joo is a powerful novel that chronicles the life of an "ordinary" South Korean woman through a series of everyday indignities and systemic discrimination. Written in a distinctive documentary style, complete with statistical footnotes, the novel follows its protagonist from childhood through marriage and motherhood, showing how gender-based discrimination shapes every aspect of her life.

The book is particularly striking in how it presents Kim Jiyoung's experiences - from being passed over for promotions to facing sexual harassment - as both deeply personal and utterly commonplace. Through its clinical, almost detached narrative voice, which presents Jiyoung's story as a case study, the novel illustrates how individual experiences reflect broader societal patterns of gender discrimination.

What makes the work especially powerful is its deliberate ordinariness - Kim Jiyoung is not an exceptional character, but rather a composite of countless real women's experiences. The novel shows how seemingly small moments of discrimination accumulate over a lifetime, eventually leading to Jiyoung's psychological breakdown where she begins speaking in the voices of other women.

The book became a cultural phenomenon in South Korea, igniting intense discussions about feminism and gender equality. Through its meticulous documentation of one woman's life, Cho creates a damning critique of patriarchal society while illuminating the countless ways gender shapes destiny in contemporary Asia and beyond.

24. "Wreck" by Tom de Freston is a genre-defying visual memoir that explores trauma, art, and healing through the lens of Théodore Géricault's masterpiece "The Raft of the Medusa." After losing his studio and life's work to a devastating fire, de Freston became obsessed with Géricault's painting, seeing in its depiction of shipwreck and survival a mirror for his own experience of loss and recovery.

The book is particularly striking in how it blends multiple forms - memoir, art history, and graphic novel - to create a layered meditation on artistic creation and destruction. De Freston weaves together his personal story with Géricault's biography and the horrific historical event that inspired "The Raft of the Medusa," creating unexpected connections between past and present traumas.

What makes the work unique is its sophisticated visual language, which combines de Freston's own artwork with reproductions and reimaginings of Géricault's painting. The book becomes a kind of artistic autopsy, dissecting both the historical masterpiece and de Freston's response to it, while exploring how artists transform suffering into art.

Through this multilayered exploration, "Wreck" offers profound insights into how art can help us process trauma and loss, while also examining the cost of obsession and the complex relationship between destruction and creation in artistic practice.

25. "Cleopatra and Frankenstein" by Coco Mellors is a magnetic novel that chronicles the whirlwind romance and subsequent marriage of Cleo, a young British artist in New York on a soon-to-expire visa, and Frank, a successful advertising executive twenty years her senior. Their impulsive wedding on New Year's Eve sets in motion a story that expands to encompass their wider circle of friends and family, examining how one relationship can create ripple effects through numerous lives.

The novel is particularly striking in how it shifts perspectives among its cast of characters, offering intimate views into their interior lives while building a complex portrait of contemporary New York. Mellors excels at depicting both the intoxicating beginnings of romance and its gradual unraveling, showing how class differences, addiction, ambition, and unresolved trauma can corrode even the most passionate connections.

What makes the work especially compelling is Mellors' precise prose and psychological insight. She captures the particular loneliness of city life, the way relationships can both save and destroy us, and the complex dynamics of power that exist within marriages. Through Cleo and Frank's story, she explores larger themes of art-making, self-destruction, and the ways we both heal and harm each other.

The novel offers a contemporary take on the marriage plot while subverting its conventions, creating a nuanced exploration of love, creativity, and the challenge of maintaining oneself while being part of a couple. Through its kaleidoscopic view of modern relationships, it examines how we build and break the connections that define us.

26. "See What You're Missing: 32 Ways to Be a Better Looker" (2023) by Will Gompertz offers a refreshing approach to experiencing art, focusing not on art history or theory but on teaching readers how to truly see the world around them. Drawing from his extensive experience as a curator and arts journalist, Gompertz argues that the skills artists use to observe reality can enrich anyone's perception of the world.

The book is particularly engaging in how it breaks down the act of seeing into specific practices and mindsets. Through 32 different approaches - from understanding negative space to recognizing patterns - Gompertz shows how artists' observational techniques can be applied to everyday life. He draws examples from both fine art and ordinary experiences, making complex artistic concepts accessible and practical.

What makes the work distinctive is how it moves beyond traditional art appreciation to become a manual for heightened awareness. Rather than focusing solely on how to look at art, Gompertz demonstrates how artistic ways of seeing can transform our experience of everything from city streets to facial expressions. He interweaves anecdotes from artists' lives with practical exercises that readers can use to develop their own observational skills.

Through this unique approach, Gompertz creates both a guide to visual literacy and an argument for the relevance of artistic thinking in everyday life. The book suggests that learning to see like an artist isn't just about appreciating art better - it's about experiencing the world more fully and meaningfully.

27. (Couldn’t finish) We’ll Always Have Paris

28. "Onwards Towards Our Noble Deaths" by Shigeru Mizuki is a semi-autobiographical manga that draws from the author's own experiences as a soldier in the Japanese Imperial Army during World War II. Set in Papua New Guinea in 1943, the work provides a devastating critique of military hierarchy and the ideology of "noble death" that defined the Japanese war effort.

The manga is particularly powerful in how it combines Mizuki's cartoonish style for depicting soldiers with highly detailed, realistic backgrounds. This artistic contrast emphasizes both the humanity of the ordinary soldiers and the harsh reality of their circumstances. Through this approach, Mizuki captures both the mundane aspects of military life and the horror of being ordered to participate in futile suicide charges.

What makes the work especially compelling is its unflinching portrayal of military absurdity and waste. Mizuki shows how commanders, safely behind the lines, ordered entire units to die in pointless attacks, while depicting the complex emotions of soldiers who knew they were being sent to meaningless deaths. The book's title itself becomes increasingly ironic as the story progresses, highlighting the gap between military propaganda and the reality of war.

Through its combination of personal testimony and artistic innovation, the manga serves as both a historical document and a powerful anti-war statement. Mizuki's work stands as one of the most important first-hand accounts of the Pacific War from a Japanese perspective, offering insights into how ordinary soldiers experienced the conflict.

29. "Wifedom: Mrs. Orwell's Invisible Life" by Anna Funder is a groundbreaking work that uncovers the hidden story of Eileen O'Shaughnessy, George Orwell's first wife. Through meticulous research and imaginative reconstruction, Funder reveals how Eileen's intellectual and practical contributions were crucial to Orwell's most important works, including "Animal Farm" and the early development of "1984."

The book is particularly powerful in how it weaves together multiple narratives: Eileen's story, Orwell's career, and Funder's own journey as a woman writer investigating the erasure of female experience from literary history. With access to previously unexplored materials, Funder shows how Eileen - a brilliant scholar in her own right - shaped Orwell's political thinking, edited his work, managed their finances, and maintained their household while pursuing her own writing.

What makes the work especially compelling is how Funder uses Eileen's erasure to examine larger questions about marriage, memory, and the writing of history. She shows how biographers have consistently minimized Eileen's role, reflecting broader patterns of how women's contributions to literary and intellectual life have been obscured. Funder's personal reflections on marriage, writing, and motherhood add another layer to this examination of how women's work becomes invisible.

Through this multilayered narrative, "Wifedom" becomes both a recovery of one woman's vital contribution to literary history and a broader meditation on how marriage can subsume women's identities into their husbands' stories. Funder challenges us to consider what other invisible lives lie behind the great works we celebrate.

30. "Manifesto: On Never Giving Up" by Bernardine Evaristo is a vibrant memoir that traces her journey from a working-class London childhood to becoming the first Black woman to win the Booker Prize. Written with the same creative energy that characterizes her fiction, this memoir combines personal history with a passionate meditation on creativity, perseverance, and identity.

The book is particularly striking in how it examines the intersection of art, activism, and personal transformation. Evaristo shares her experiences as a founder of Britain's first Black women's theatre company, her experiments with form and genre in writing, and her decades of work to increase diversity in British literature - all while facing the challenges of being a Black, mixed-race woman in a predominantly white literary establishment.

What makes the work especially powerful is how it functions both as a personal narrative and as a guide for creative resilience. Evaristo details the years of relative obscurity during which she continued to innovate and create, ultimately developing her unique "fusion fiction" style. She examines her relationships, her family history, her sexuality, and her creative process with remarkable candor, showing how each aspect of her life informed her development as an artist.

Through this interweaving of memoir and manifesto, Evaristo creates an inspiring testament to artistic perseverance and the importance of creating one's own path. Her story becomes both a celebration of finally receiving long-deserved recognition and a rallying cry for artists to persist in their vision despite obstacles and setbacks.

31. "Martyr" (2024) by Kaveh Akbar (couldnt finish) (will pick it up again)

32. Monsters by Claire Dederer (Couldn’t finish) (will pick it up again)

33. "My Port of Beirut" by Lamia Ziadé is a powerful graphic memoir that documents the aftermath of the devastating explosion that rocked Beirut's port on August 4, 2020. Through a combination of detailed illustrations and personal narrative, Ziadé creates both a testament to loss and a love letter to her wounded city.

The book is particularly striking in how it uses visual storytelling to capture both the immediate devastation of the explosion and its rippling effects through the city's physical and social fabric. Ziadé's intricate drawings document destroyed neighborhoods, damaged historical buildings, and displaced residents, while also reaching back to explore the port's history as the heart of Beirut's commerce and culture.

What makes the work especially compelling is how it moves between the personal and the collective experience of tragedy. Ziadé weaves together her own memories of the port with the stories of other Beirutis, creating a layered portrait of a community grappling with loss and reconstruction. Her detailed illustrations of objects - both destroyed and preserved - become powerful symbols of memory and resilience.

Through this careful documentation of both physical destruction and emotional aftermath, Ziadé creates a vital historical record while also examining larger questions about memory, urban identity, and how communities rebuild after catastrophe. The book stands as both an elegy for what was lost and a meditation on how cities and their residents survive trauma.

34. "Constellations: Reflections from Life" by Sinéad Gleeson is a luminous collection of essays that explores the body in both sickness and health. From her childhood battle with arthritis and a rare bone condition to her later experiences with leukemia and motherhood, Gleeson weaves together personal history with meditations on art, literature, and what it means to live in a female body.

The book is particularly striking in how it connects bodily experience to larger cultural and political questions. Gleeson examines how women's bodies have been controlled and legislated in Ireland, while also exploring how pain, illness, and recovery shape our understanding of ourselves. Her essays move fluidly between the personal and the political, finding unexpected connections between her own medical history and Ireland's social transformation.

What makes the work especially powerful is Gleeson's ability to transmute physical suffering into philosophical insight and literary beauty. She draws on a wide range of references - from Frida Kahlo to Adrienne Rich - while developing her own metaphors for pain, healing, and transformation. The title itself becomes a governing metaphor, as Gleeson shows how we create meaning by connecting disparate points of experience.

Through these interconnected essays, she creates both a memoir of bodily experience and a broader examination of how gender, illness, and identity intersect. The result is a work that illuminates the profound connections between physical experience and artistic creation, showing how we make meaning from the stories we tell about our bodies.

35. "Minor Detail" by Adania Shibli is a taut, haunting novel structured in two parallel narratives set exactly 25 years apart. The first half meticulously follows an Israeli army unit in the Negev Desert in 1949, focusing on a brutal crime against a young Bedouin woman. The second follows a contemporary Palestinian woman who becomes obsessed with investigating this historical atrocity, which occurred exactly 25 years before her birth.

The novel is particularly powerful in its stark, precise prose and its innovative structure. Shibli's writing is deliberately clinical in the first section, documenting military operations and violence with a detachment that makes the events even more chilling. The second half creates a mirror image through its narrator's increasingly desperate attempts to uncover the truth about the past, showing how historical violence continues to reverberate through the present.

What makes the work especially compelling is how it explores the relationship between major and minor historical narratives. Through its focus on a single, "minor" incident, the novel examines how certain stories are erased from official histories while others persist through time. Shibli's precise attention to detail becomes both a literary strategy and a moral stance, suggesting that no act of violence is truly minor.

Through this careful examination of history, memory, and violence, "Minor Detail" creates a powerful meditation on how past traumas continue to shape present realities. The novel demonstrates how the most carefully documented atrocities can still resist full understanding, while questioning who has the right to tell which stories.

36. "Days of Abandonment" by Elena Ferrante is a fierce, unsparing novel that chronicles a woman's psychological unraveling after her husband suddenly leaves her and their two children. Through the voice of Olga, the abandoned wife, Ferrante creates an intense exploration of marriage, motherhood, and the threat of self-dissolution.

The novel is particularly powerful in its visceral depiction of emotional crisis. As Olga's carefully ordered life begins to collapse, Ferrante captures her descent with brutal precision - from her initial shock through waves of rage, despair, and near-madness. The narrative becomes increasingly claustrophobic as Olga finds herself literally trapped in her apartment during a sweltering summer day, caring for sick children and a dying dog while grappling with her own deteriorating grip on reality.

What makes the work especially compelling is Ferrante's unflinching examination of female anger and desire. She dismantles romantic notions of marriage and motherhood, showing how women's identities can become dangerously bound to these roles. Through Olga's crisis, Ferrante explores what happens when a woman must reconstruct herself after losing the scaffolding of her former life.

Through its intense psychological realism and raw emotional honesty, the novel creates a devastating portrait of abandonment while also examining larger questions about female identity and autonomy. Ferrante's prose is relentless in its examination of how quickly the structures of domestic life can unravel, and what it takes to rebuild oneself from such destruction.

37. "Finding Me" by Viola Davis is a raw and revelatory memoir that traces her journey from extreme poverty in Rhode Island to becoming one of America's most respected actresses. Davis writes with unflinching honesty about growing up in a household marked by poverty, abuse, and racism, while also celebrating the people and moments that helped her survive and ultimately thrive.

The memoir is particularly powerful in how it examines the intersections of race, class, and trauma. Davis details her experiences of childhood hunger, racist bullying, and family violence, while also exploring how she found her voice through school, theater, and eventually Juilliard. She's remarkably candid about her struggles with self-worth, her experiences as a dark-skinned Black woman in Hollywood, and her path to healing from childhood trauma.

What makes the work especially compelling is Davis's ability to move between past and present, showing how early experiences shaped her life while also documenting her rise in theater and film. She writes with particular insight about the challenges faced by Black actresses in Hollywood, the pressure to compromise one's identity for success, and her determination to create meaningful representation through her work.

Through this deeply personal narrative, Davis creates both a memoir of triumph over adversity and a meditation on what it means to truly find oneself. She examines how art can be both a means of escape and a path to self-discovery, while offering a powerful testament to the importance of owning one's story, complete with all its pain and glory.

38. (Still reading) "1000 Years of Joys and Sorrows" by Ai Weiwei is a sweeping memoir that interweaves the artist's own story with that of his father, poet Ai Qing, creating a multi-generational portrait of artistic life in China. Through this dual narrative, Ai examines how political forces shaped both their lives - his father's exile during the Cultural Revolution and his own surveillance, detention, and eventual exile under contemporary Chinese authority.

The memoir is particularly striking in how it illuminates the relationship between art and resistance. Ai moves fluidly between personal memory, political history, and artistic philosophy, showing how his father's experience of persecution influenced his own development as an artist and activist. His account of his 81-day detention in 2011 becomes not just a personal testimony but an examination of how authoritarian power attempts to silence artistic voices.

What makes the work especially powerful is its exploration of memory and witness. The title refers to a moment when Ai, concerned he might not see his young son again during his detention, decided to write this memoir to preserve their family story. The book becomes both a personal legacy and a broader meditation on how artists maintain their voice and vision under political pressure.

Through this layered narrative, Ai creates not just a family history but a profound examination of art's role in maintaining human dignity and freedom. He shows how personal memory becomes political resistance, and how art can preserve truth in the face of power that seeks to erase it. The memoir stands as both a testament to artistic resilience and a warning about the fragility of freedom of expression.

39. "Tiny Beautiful Things" is a profound collection of advice columns written by Cheryl Strayed during her time as "Dear Sugar" on The Rumpus. Rather than offering simple solutions, Strayed responds to readers' dilemmas with raw honesty, deep empathy, and stories from her own life, transforming the advice column format into something approaching literary memoir.

The book is particularly powerful in how Strayed meets each letter writer's pain with radical compassion and unflinching truth-telling. Whether addressing questions about love, loss, infidelity, family trauma, or creative struggles, she draws on her own experiences - including her mother's death, her divorce, and her past drug use - to illuminate universal truths about human suffering and resilience.

What makes the work especially compelling is how it blends practical wisdom with emotional depth. Strayed's responses often begin with personal stories that seem to veer away from the letter writer's question, only to circle back with unexpected insights that cut to the heart of the matter. Her signature phrase "sweet pea" becomes more than just an endearment - it's an acknowledgment of both the tenderness and toughness needed to face life's challenges.

Through these exchanges, Strayed creates not just a collection of advice but a meditation on what it means to live fully and authentically through pain, joy, and uncertainty. The book becomes a testament to the power of radical honesty and deep listening, showing how sharing our stories can help us make sense of life's most difficult moments.

40. "Fence" (English translation) by Ila Arab Mehta is a powerful novel that follows Fateema, a young Muslim woman in Gujarat, as she struggles to transcend the invisible barriers - the "fences" - that her religious identity creates in Indian society. Through Fateema's determination to pursue education and independence, Mehta explores the complex intersections of gender, religion, and social mobility in contemporary India.

The novel is particularly striking in how it examines both physical and metaphorical boundaries, showing how prejudice and social expectations create invisible but powerful barriers in everyday life. Through Fateema's experiences, Mehta reveals how religious identity can become a fence that both protects and constrains, while exploring the personal cost of trying to cross established social boundaries.

What makes the work especially compelling is its nuanced portrayal of Muslim life in India, showing both the richness of community and the challenges of discrimination. Mehta creates a narrative that moves beyond simple victimhood to examine how individuals navigate complex social realities while maintaining their sense of self and community.

Through Fateema's story, the novel offers a thoughtful exploration of what it means to seek belonging and advancement in a society divided by multiple forms of discrimination, while also celebrating the resilience of those who dare to challenge established boundaries.

41. "Treasures of the Thunder Dragon: A Portrait of Bhutan" by Ashi Dorji Wangmo Wangchuck is an intimate portrait of Bhutan that blends personal memoir with cultural history. As the Queen of Bhutan, the author offers a unique insider's perspective of her country, weaving together her experiences of traveling through remote villages with historical accounts, folklore, and observations of Bhutan's transformation from an isolated kingdom to a modern nation.

The book is particularly notable for how it captures Bhutan during a pivotal period of change. Through her travels and encounters with citizens across the country, the Queen documents traditional ways of life that are gradually shifting with modernization, while also exploring how Bhutan maintains its cultural identity through concepts like Gross National Happiness.

What makes the work especially compelling is its combination of personal narrative and cultural documentation. The author shares both royal perspective and deeply human encounters, describing remote monasteries, local festivals, and the daily lives of people in different regions of Bhutan. Her accounts of walking through remote mountain villages offer rare insights into areas of the country rarely seen by outsiders.

Through these intertwined narratives, the book creates a multifaceted portrait of a nation balancing tradition and progress. It serves as both a personal memoir and a valuable historical document of Bhutan during a time of significant transition, offering insights into how a traditional Buddhist kingdom navigates the challenges of the modern world.

42. "The Search" created in collaboration with the Anne Frank House, is a graphic novel that tells the story of Esther, a fictional Jewish girl whose experiences parallel Anne Frank's. The narrative follows her journey of survival during the Holocaust, while also functioning as an educational tool that helps young readers understand the historical context of the Nazi persecution of Jews.

The book is particularly powerful in how it balances historical accuracy with accessibility. Through carefully researched illustrations and storytelling, it depicts the gradual implementation of anti-Jewish measures in Amsterdam, the impact of betrayal and collaboration, and the complex networks of resistance and survival. The parallel structure with Anne Frank's story helps readers understand the broader context in which her diary was written.

What makes the work especially compelling is its attention to both historical detail and emotional truth. The graphic novel format allows for a sensitive yet direct approach to difficult subject matter, making the history of the Holocaust accessible to younger readers without minimizing its horror. The book includes extensive background information and teaching materials developed by the Anne Frank House.

Through this combination of personal narrative and historical documentation, "The Search" creates an important educational tool that helps new generations understand the Holocaust through both individual experience and broader historical context. It stands as both a companion to Anne Frank's diary and an independent work that illuminates this crucial period of history.

43. "The Vegetarian" by Han Kang is a startling, surreal novel that begins with a simple act of refusal: a woman named Yeong-hye decides, after a disturbing dream, to stop eating meat. This seemingly small decision sets off a chain of increasingly violent events as her choice is seen as an act of rebellion against her family, society, and Korean patriarchal culture.

The novel is particularly powerful in how it unfolds through three linked perspectives - those of Yeong-hye's husband, brother-in-law, and sister - while Yeong-hye herself remains largely silent except for brief, dreamlike interludes. Through these shifting viewpoints, Han explores how Yeong-hye's quiet rebellion transforms into a radical attempt to reject human violence and ultimately humanity itself, as she progressively restricts her eating and begins to identify with plants.

What makes the work especially compelling is its exploration of violence in its many forms - familial, sexual, medical, and societal. Han's prose moves between stark realism and fever-dream fantasy as Yeong-hye's resistance evolves from vegetarianism to a more extreme form of bodily transcendence. The novel becomes both a critique of conformity and an examination of how the body becomes a battleground for competing demands of society, family, and individual desire.

Through this dark and haunting narrative, Han creates a profound meditation on power, violence, and the attempt to escape the human condition entirely. The result is a work that defies easy categorization, operating simultaneously as feminist allegory, horror story, and philosophical exploration of what it means to be human.

Will update the reads from last two weeks of 2024 shortly :) Wish me power!

This Week In The Studio 26/2024

I slipped in my reporting for last two weeks but a great side effect of writing these weekly notes was that I had that nagging feeling at the back of my head reminding me of my slippage.

There was a tiny lesson that my piano instructor told me about that fits here.

He said, when we usually get stuck on a part of a melody, we try to start from the beginning of the tune to resume practice again and again. Instead of that, consider the sheet music like a map. When you get stuck in on a junction, just practice going around that junction and move forward. Don’t go back to the beginning of the map and restart from the beginning.

It didn’t feel like much of an advice when I heard it, but when I put it to use, it was gold! So here I am, starting from where I left my weekly notes.

This week in the studio

1. On Saturday, I logged in to Instagram in the morning to see Harshita’s pictures of the Anomalie Tattoos she had ordered. I already love her current permanent floral tattoos on her arms and the pansies were fitting in so beautifully. When friends find the time to click aesthetic images for your baby brand, I file it under ‘love language’.

View fullsize

View fullsize

2. On Saturday, my godchild returned from her drawing class with a gorgeous surrealistic drawing where she imaged her family as animals and sketched the composition over 12 days. Both - the drawing and her creativity inspired me to pick up my sketch pencils after a week to draw out a composition. Spent a large part of Saturday with Pooja and Deepika and loved hanging out with them after months.

3. I devoured Cleopatra and Frankenstein by Coco Mellors on Saturday all through Sunday. It was one of those books for which I woke up at 4 AM just to relish the last 50 pages in absolute silence of the breaking dawn.

4. After a hiatus of perhaps a decade, on Sunday, I booked a movie ticket just for myself to watch Inside Out -2. I am deeply interested in movies and it is one of the pleasures for me that I delight in partaking solo. I used to constantly go for movies alone while in college and somehow, that practice kept slipping away from me. Felt real good because the movie was also great and I was able to connect to a past version of myself that I believed I had lost.

5. In the last update, I was able to play a rhyme on the piano after reading to sheet music. It is the old, trusty Old MacDonald and I was giddy enough to record it and spam friends and family with it.

Rest of the week has been work mostly and I might have some interesting updates in the coming week regarding that.

Beautiful brand images by Olio Stories

I’ve been a fan of Olio Stories since the time they were making clothes and it’s been a decade now. Everytime they share a brand edit, it drips with authentic honesty that I just can’t ignore. Here is the founder’s maternal grandfather sporting Olio jewels and giving us all kind of goals.

In this age of obsession with being and staying young, these set of images serve as a reminder that fashion isn’t just for the unwrinkled (rather looks lovelier on aged souls).

A Hand Sculpted House in Rishikesh

Came to know about Tiny Farm Lab today and the hand made house they built in Rishikesh.

“Inspired by the birds, bees, and termites,
we wanted to create something sacred with our hands..”

— Tiny Farm Lab

“No one involved in making the house was an architect or an artist, and yet what they created proves otherwise. They say form follows function, but in our case, the form follows the community,”

This week in the studio 22/2024

This entire week was a miracle of a kind. The last week as Friday started approaching on the calendar, I started feeling that despair one gets at the beginning of a flu. When upon waking up, you know in your tired muscles that something isn’t right and that an ailment is imminent - that dread was all over me in the beginning of last week.

Keeping up with it, I did succumb to some flu or a bug that rendered me completely useless for the most part of the last week. On Friday, there was travel planned to Bhutan and even till Thursday evening, I was quite unsure on whether I’ll be able to get up from my bed at all in Bhutan - let alone do hikes and visit monasteries.

I told all the friends who asked to pray for me (one of the firsts) so I could enjoy my holiday and Namrata, who had given me tips on Bhutan promptly replied saying the landscape will heal me.

This week in the studio:

1. On Friday, Anomalie Tattoos opened up our first physical booth in collaboration with Stab Therapy tattoos at the AYCS, Mumbai. Sending our stock to Mumbai, preparing for the tattoos for display and finally making it to the booth was an experience in itself. When I started receiving pictures of people putting up our tattoos, I couldn’t help but watch the little videos on repeat.

2. It was on Friday also that I took the flight to Paro, Bhutan from Kolkata with Paras for a 5 night, 6 day stay in Bhutan. I had done some preparation by reading this book written by the Queen Mother, Treasures Of The Thunder Dragon the previous week. Reading about a culture before I had the opportunity to experience it proved to be an eye opener for me. I was able to follow the stories and the gravity of rituals as our guide was explaining and as a practice, if I can continue to do the same pre-work prior to all my travels, I’ll be enriching my experience manyfold.

3. First day in Bhutan was eventful as we managed to see a 15th century monastery connected with a 600 year old bridge, confluence of two rivers, ate my first Ema datshi with fried rice (Bhutan’s National Dish), witnessed the surreal Buddha Dordenma statue, went to a Takin reserve (Bhutan’s National Animal) and wrapped up the day by going to a local pub where a fantastic band was playing! I admit even writing this down is unbelievable because I have become a one-outdoor activity per day kind of person, but given that we weren’t making decisions on the next stop and had an excellent guide plus that sweet sweet mountain air, we did get carried away.

4. On Saturday, it was time to move to Punakha and the founder of the travel agency had invited a bunch of people travelling through their agency for a local lunch at his home. I met three women travellers during the lunch, one of whom had come from Nepal having finished the trek to Everest Base Camp and the ATC trail. It was quite inspiring to hear her stories. I also had my first butter tea and fresh cheese momos in the country.

5. On Saturday, after reaching Punakha, I had requested a session with a monk and we met up with Monk Kinley Wangchuk. For about an hour and a half, I heard Buddhist philosophy and teachings by him on the subjectivity of our gaze and Buddhist thoughts on eating meat, how to live a Buddhist life without becoming a monk.

6. The highlight of Sunday was waking up in the mountains of Punakha and getting to finish a small drawing before starting the day. I had taken my entire set of 72 coloured pencils and getting in a drawing while having a great coffee with a view made it worthwhile.

7. While sightseeing happened over the course of the next few days and I was lucky to visit some key places in Punakha such as the Punakha dzong, the suspension bridge and a gorgeous nunnery before leaving drenched in rains.

8. On the last day in Bhutan, the trek to Tiger’s Nest was a highlight that trumped over the entire stay. Done over 7 hours and to an elevation of 10,000 ft above sea level. It was physically the most exhausting thing I had undertaken ever and during the descent, there came a time when my fingers were completely cold and my right foot was shaking uncontrollably. I have seen movies where a transformative journey takes place through a taxing trek and I did come close to understanding the feeling. I have more written in my journal about the trek. Till three days after the trek, I was limping with sore legs and now that the soreness has subsided, I can look back at the journey and understand how in its beauty, it had the potential for healing.

9. Reading Breasts and Eggs by Mieko Kawakami has been an experience that I can only describe as floating over an endless shallow river. How are Japanese writers able to movie so swiftly through dreams and reality? Is it the closeness to nature? Or is the DNA of the literature?

This week in the studio 20/2024

This year is racing past like a rabbit on steroids and every now and then, I reflect on the weeks going back, take a deep sigh and move on with the next task on my plate.

Given the ongoing guilt I feel of not examining/reflecting enough, this weekly writing is the least I can commit to, for my own sanity. I also got inspired by a similar weekly writing project by a friend who also seems to be on a similar documentation path in life.

This week in the studio

1. Last Saturday, Satya didi, our cook plucked almost five kilos of mangoes from the tree that’s right outside our balcony. I had been eyeing the mangoes ever since they started ripening but I didn’t imagine that’s how many they’ll turn out to be. Looking at the plucked harvest, I went back to see that there were almost double of the harvested amount still hanging from the tree. I am not adept at thinking of the delicacies to be made (generally not creative in the kitchen and not a foodie for sure) so the task of putting all these mangoes to good use is left to Satya didi.

2. On Saturday, after a hiatus of more than a year, I was able to organise a small ‘Drawing Room’ session with friends. We got with the initial intention of making collages but ended up drawing zines. These sessions had become a weekly activity in 2022-23 and somehow I loosened my grip on it and the sessions made way for just house parties. Anyway, with this session, Kenneth got a lot of great coffees to brew along with a substantial brewing equipment and Noopur, Rasagy, Paras and I got the pleasure of sipping on amazing coffee while drawing.

3. After much back and forth (a little heated back and forth), I finally received the packaging envelopes for my independent temp tattoo brand, Anomalie Tattoo Co and knew that the rest of the week was going to be spent in packing orders and dispatching them. Specially because customers had started asking for their order updates and I was losing patience rapidly. So when the envelopes finally arrived, I hugged them for good luck and started dispatching our first tattoos to customers!

4. I went to Spirit Forward, a bar that was taken over by a Goan bar, Grumps. Its not usual that I feel the need to go out for a drink but I was positively grumpy that day and felt that a yummy drink could fix my mood. Fix it did actually. The cocktails were quite yummy but I ended up eating a wild mushroom dish that made the next day quite unbearable for me in the stomach department.

5. I received the hand tufted rugs made from my drawings and without any shame, I was smitten the moment I set my eyes on them. There’s definitely more of them coming specially with how they came out.

Writing this on a Friday night going through the phone photo gallery made me acutely aware of how documenting our lives and reflecting on them can stretch the fabric of time, albeit a little bit.

Studio MAMA

Saw this mini documentary on Studio Mama, a London based architectural and furniture design studio run by wife-husband duo. In this documentary, they show the delightful designs they are able to make from waste. I might be a sucker for Scandinavian design after all.

Embed Block

Add an embed URL or code. Learn more

You'll be happier. Daniel Lombroso’s short film follows a patient as she goes under the knife.

The Brazilian Butt lift is the world’s most dangerous cosmetic surgery procedure with 1 in 3000 patients dying from it.

Daniel Lombroso (https://www.instagram.com/dlumbo/) a Director and a Journalist made this short film following a patient as she prepared herself, convinced herself to go through the Brazilian Butt Lift surgery.

What struck me the most was the words by the surgeon as he prepared her for the surgery.

“You’ll be happier.”

You'll Be Happier from The New Yorker on Vimeo.

A quote on the inconceivable nature of reality as discovered by 23 year old Werner Heisenberg in the solitude of an island

Werner Heisenberg, a 23 year old German Theoretical Physicist went to an archipelago to recover from hay fever. Helgoland is an island with no trees, hence no pollen.

There, he discovered a mathematical structure of denoting atomic reality which by itself is some sort of an oddity and yet which tended to compute correct results in predicting the outputs of experiments and now are used in quantum computers and atomic bombs.

One quote from the book, Helgoland by Carlo Rovelli is particularly fascinating because I read the name, Buddha in a book of Quantum Physics.

“
An electron is a particular type of regularity that appears among measurements and observations that we make. It is more pattern than a substance. It is order...Thus we arrive at a strange place. We break things down into smaller and smaller pieces, but then the pieces, when examined, are not there. Just the arrangements of them are. What then, are things, like the boat, or its sails, or your fingernails? What are they? If things are forms of forms of forms of forms, and if forms are order, and order is defined by us..they exist, it would appear, only as created by, and in relation to, us and the Universe. They are, the Buddha might say, emptiness.
”

— Cosmological Koans, Anthony Aguirre

21 days of meditation drawings

I have a selfish relationship with meditation. A little too selfish. Whenever I am in a deep rut, I run to it like a fish without water. I would meditate for an hour, sleep with meditation music on, take frequent breaks to tune into 5 minutes of guided meditations. You get the drift.

It works too. I feel connected to myself, my deepest sense of existence and I am able to tap into some unknown source of stability that is usually able to drag me out of dark places.

However, I also know that in order to nourish a mindspace where its easier to respond to emotions, this streak of selfish meditations must give way to a continuous practise.

Sometime in late 2020 though, I started drawing immediately after a meditation session. With no expectation of form and shape, I was able to return to a pure play of colour. Sometimes I would draw the shapes I saw when my eyes were closed during meditation and sometimes I would draw along as a guided meditation played along.

Today, as I was listening to my favourite Buddhist teacher on YouTube: Nick Keomahavong, he suggested to use chanting as a way of meditation. He also suggested to try chanting for 21 days to reap the benefits.

I immediately reflected back to my days of drawing my meditations and how I loved the process of a quiet reflection looking internally and then putting to paper forms and colours that I experienced during the process.

I want to go back to the same feeling and hence, this project. 21 days of meditation drawings.

A drawing from the book Tantra Song - one of the only books to survey the elusive tradition of abstract Tantric painting from Rajasthan, India—sold out in a swift six weeks. Rendered by hand on found pieces of paper and used primarily for meditation, the works depict deities as geometric, vividly hued shapes and mark a clear departure from Tantric art’s better-known figurative styles. They also resonate uncannily with lineages of twentieth-century art—from the Bauhaus and Russian Constructivism to Minimalism—as well as with much painting today. Rarely have the ancient and the modern come together so fluidly. Read more about these meditation paintings here

Watched Tove finally.

Woke up early, bleeding. Found the movie and watched it. Found it average. Did not speak to me other than the studio scenes that are recreated.

A shot from director Zaida Bergroth’s "Tove," filmed on Kodak 16mm by DP Linda Wassberg. Photo by Sami Kuokkanen.

What is an artist's life?

I am reading the biography of Tove Jansson, the Finnish artist who drew the wildly famous characters of Moomins. After having watched the trailer of her biopic by Zaida Bergroth, I certainly have been hooked.

After rummaging through youtube for all the documentaries available, I finally decided to turn to the books (never a disappointing decision). In this one, there is a mention of hundreds of letters that Tove is writing to her art school friends and her lovers - mostly about her life growing up the world war 2 years, but also her decisions on art. I couldn’t help but feel slightly jealous. I haven’t been to art school ( a decision I don’t regret as I think its only now in my third decade that I have concrete feelings about things to say something about them). Hence, I don’t know a lot of my contemporaries with whom I share my views on art, discuss works or plan shows.

There are a few friends who are on the same path as mine for sure, but for now, it does feel like a solitary road.

Writing I’ve found is a detox for the mind. When I write, I vacuum clean my brain of all the old dust of thoughts and ideas and plans and dreams and make way for new dust. Hence, I thought of writing about my journey here. Hopefully, I’ll find more artists willing to connect and share their thoughts. If not, I’ll have a really clean mind :D

The book I am reading:

Tove Jansson: Work and Love by Tuula Karjalainen

Week 24: The year is half empty or half full?

A numbered list of stuff I was upto this week

1. Watched three and a half movies

   1. The Personal History of David Copperfield (couldn’t finish, found it a little too obnoxious for my taste.)

   2. Amal: Liked the story and the situations the characters find themselves in. Couldn't find the diction of the leading character matching the language of the city the film is based in. Found it uncanny. Enjoyed the film nonetheless.

   3. A Woman in Berlin: Got to know about this aspect of the second world war. Based on a book by the same name, the movie speaks about the time when the Soviet army occupied Berlin during the tail end of WW|| and raping women in Berlin as victory hauls. A moving film that did justice to both sides of the story.

      More can be read here -> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_during_the_occupation_of_Germany

   4. Shiva Baby: Gorgeous movie set in a single day. A bi-sexual girl fighting her emotions about her sugar daddy. Loved all performances!

2. Tried some experiments in the kitchen, thanks to a gift I got: Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat

   1. Made peach syrup for the first time. 5 peaches boiled with loads of jaggery to be mixed with soda for spritzers/lemonades

   2. Did the prep for Cherry infused gin and it should take 20 more days to be ready.

3. Lost a wisdom tooth :(

4. Worked a lot. Which explains why this list is so short.

5. Have set aside a budget for trauma therapy for girls between the ages of 15-25 who lost a parent to Covid19. Really hoping it helps someone.

The second wave might be behind us, but the destruction has been staggering, specially for young people dealing with loss of a parent.

Happy to put aside 10k/mo to sponsor trauma therapy for girls in the age group 15-25 who lost a parent to Covid.
Please dm or tell someone.

— Aakanksha Gaur (@sia_steel) June 19, 2021

4 weeks of uselessness

Hello friends,

Sabbatical comes from the Hebrew word shabbat (שבת) (i.e., Sabbath), in Latin: sabbaticus, in Greek: sabbatikos (σαββατικός)) which is a rest or break from work.

Although a sabbatical is a longer break, colloquially translating to months and months of break, I started with a 4-week break to understand my readiness for a sufficient swathe of time that was directly in my control. I did not want to impose a project on this break primarily because it would have ended up becoming a cause of stress for me and would have undid the very reason of this break in the first place.

While I am writing about my experience of 4 weeks of not ‘doing anything’, I am fully aware that taking a break this long at my age is a privilege I haven’t seen any woman around me exercise. My mother, in her thirty eight years of working never once took a holiday that wasn’t due to a health emergency or a health emergency in family. The prospect of her taking off on an extended break from work to ‘heal’ was neither in the landscape of thought nor was uttered as a passing phrase.

When she would have been the age I am, I would have crossed over from primary school to middle school. I would have exchanged our primary uniform of a mauve frock worn over a white cotton blouse to now a mauve skirt whose ascending lengths were proving to be an issue of torment for our teachers in our all-girls school. In my fifth standard, my mother was so struck by the domestic demands and her job that she told me flatly about her absolute inability to take the responsibility for my studies. I would now have to study by myself. Perhaps, that decision would have given some break to her?

Before I went on this break, I could feel myself spiralling down again. I was mentally exhausted and it showed every other day in some form of ache and pain. In the three weeks leading up to my sabbatical, I was popping pain killers almost every other day again. Every night one could see the wire of a heating pad dangling from where I would sleep and I would wake up nauseated. Things would settle down by the time of my work meetings and it would repeat all over again.

So immersed was I in the narrative of work and its meaning that I had never taken the time to disentangle my being from the productivity of my body and mind. In the last ten years and going back further, I had fully made myself believe that not working in an office for a job that was paying me would be the very definition of ‘uselessness’. This false construct of work as tied to the direct economic merit was not only going against my felt experience, but was actively dispiriting.

These four weeks were the first intentional break of my professional life thus far and I didn’t want to actively pass a judgement on it. So I have compiled a list of things I did in my 4 weeks of uselessness for you to form your own judgements.

1. Went on a drive 423 Kms away from my place passing through the majestic western ghats

2. Drew by the beach side for two weeks every day

---

3. Documented the patterns of sand bubbler crabs

In sandy beaches of certain tropical beaches in Indo-Pacific lives a tiny crab whose feeding habits creates intricate patterns consisting of thousands of sand balls on the beach.

When the high tide goes off, these crabs start to nibble on the thin coating of organic matter on sand grains. Can you believe it? They nibble on the coating of organic matter on grains of sand! As they keep burrowing deeper into the sand, they keep nibbling and pressing the excess into a ball which they kick out of their burrows.

The result are gorgeous patterns of sand balls on the beach.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

---

4. Saw the evening blending into night

All photos were taken a few minutes apart.

---

5. Re-read a book and drew a project from it

I am fascinated by words and love to incorporate it into my drawing work. While re-reading The Collected Schizophrenias, I highlighted text - passing passages, beautifully constructed phrases for a drawing project I will be undertaking on the book.

---

6. Witnessed the great conjunction

A great conjunction is a conjunction of the planets Jupiter and Saturn, when the two planets appear closest together in the sky. Great conjunctions occur approximately every 20 years when Jupiter "overtakes" Saturn in its orbit. They are named "great" for being by far the rarest of the conjunctions between naked-eye planets

I was extremely lucky to spot this event with the naked eye (along with some help from a star gazing app) The photographs from my phone didn’t come out well so these are the screenshots from the star gazing app confirming that it was indeed Jupiter that we were looking at.

---

12. FONDEST SUNSET

My mother has never been to Goa or to a beach city. We had made plans for her travel now that she is no longer working but 2020 came along and did what it did to everyone’s plans. One evening as I was strolling along the beach at sunset, I decided to video call mom. As I flipped the camera towards the beach, her excitement at seeing the setting sun was evident. So that evening, I kept the video on as she saw a sunset on the beach for the first time. As the sky kept changing colours, I kept showing her the waves, the sky and the last rays of the setting sun.

It wasn’t any close to what she would feel seeing the real thing - but the way she reacted on even witnessing it with me on a video call was extremely precious.

7. Slept for nine hours. Every single day!

Somedays, I would have slept for more. Who knows :)

8. Started running everyday

I am glad that I discovered running and that discovery happened on a beach. I started running early morning barefoot on the beautiful beach and loved the feeling. I used to be concerned about the impact of running on my already inflamed body, but given that I was eating healthy, was not stressed at all and was meditating, running proved to be a beautiful form of exercise.

9. Made my acquaintance with Ruth Asawa

By a stroke of luck as I was ordering a few books online, a book on Ruth Asawa caught my eye. I hadn’t known about her or her work and given that it was a weighty book, had decided to chug it along for my Goa stay. For the first week of the break, I was curled up in the life of Ruth Asawa, her questions on identity and her insistence on living on her own terms.

This is the book I was reading. Everything She Touched and would recommend it to anyone who wishes to make an enquiry into a gorgeous hand made life.

Image taken from ruthasawa.com

---

10. Spent an afternoon in an independent bookstore

When it comes to bookstores, I can never get out of it fully content. You can leave me for two hours or twenty minutes, I’ll only come out grumpy at all the shelves I couldn’t see. I absolutely have to scan almost every book before deciding to move on. Could it be a disease? May be so! So when I took an entire day to visit the Literati Bookstore and Cafe in Calangute. I didn’t have anything else planned for the day and given the size of the bookstore, was able to scan the collection twice :D

---

11. Finished reading a book in two days

Because I have mentioned this in my highlights, you would know that this is important to me. Not for flexing that I can read through 300+ pages in two days but for the stretch of time and consistent focus that tends to slips so fast nowadays. It felt really really nice to not do anything but just sit down with a book engrossed in the story and finish reading it without any distractions (other than long naps).

---

13. Discovered the quiet magic of flaneuring

In the apartment complex where I stay, every evening hoardes of neighbours come out for their evening walk. It is a small complex and people keep walking around in the complex in circles. Going in circles round and round sometimes for hours. I did that as well. During the lockdown, getting out was not possible but when it is now, I did understand it was a peculiar habit. There is an entire world to be discovered in the neighbourhood. New shops keep mushrooming and shutting, there are florists and fruit sellers on bicycles, houses with overgrown gardens and sounds and scents of varying degrees.

Why did I keep walking in circles? Why didn’t I walk in my neighbourhood instead?

I changed that in my break. Flaneuring is the act of strolling or simply a mindful wander. During the break, I started on long, sometimes solitary walks in Goa and around my house.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

---

14. started a book giveaway and gave away 70% of my wardrobe

I have had a very patchy relationship with fashion. Growing up, I never really cared much about it and now as a grown up (aargh), I find it at best a functional obligation so far. Even then, I had a cupboard full of clothes most of which were not worn or ones that I kept for the time I was going to trim down. I just said goodbye to them and packed them for a giveaway.

My aim for my wardrobe is to limit it to 10 items per season. Given that I stay in a city which is summers the entire year round, I need to trim down my wardrobe considerably. I am still in search of a good capsule wardrobe to follow and would continue on this journey of simplifying this year.

With books the relationship is more love-love making it harder to part ways with. I picked up the books I had read and I was sure I wasn’t going to read again and started a book giveaway. Posted them on my instagram stories and just gave them away to readers in my city. Did that for 30 books so far and I have lots more to give!

---

15. DREW EVERYDAY

Drawings are still packed in the sketchbooks and need to be put into through the raging laser eyes of my scanner. Those would follow.

---

So yeah, this is the record of my useless moments over the last four weeks. I am leaving you all with two pictures - a morning and a sunset that I witnessed from where I was for two weeks.

View fullsize

View fullsize

I wish you a year that is intentional, deliberate and has room for growth. Happy 2021!

From the studio: The week of awakening

Hello to whoever is reading this :)

Last week on Sunday, I decided to go to a nearby hiking spot. I had only climbed a handful of steps that I lost sensation in my legs. It was bad enough that I had to sit out the entire time clicking pictures of the sky and seeing people huffing and puffing their way through to the top of the hill.

At that moment, I felt nothing but pity on myself and my body. To be sitting there, breathless and numb was very painful to admit. The days that have followed have not seen me operating in 100% capacity. I still feel fatigued, unable to sometimes walk for more than 2000 steps at a time and chained with nausea.

In times like these, it is the hardest to feel kind for yourself and to give your pain the acknowledgement it deserves. However, I have set myself a very small yet challenging-enough goal and I do end up ticking it off on most days.

Full moon

Monday was full moon night and I wanted to take a breather from overthinking and sit with the moonrise. Indigenous cultures have dedicated rituals around the lunar cycle and specially around the full moon. While I am yet to discover these beliefs of cleansing myself, I did discover that aligning yourself with cycles gives you a sense of mark making in time.

Just like celebrating birthdays that come once a year, a full moon occurs every month and can be a natural mark to stop in your tracks, reflect and realign with your intention for the next month. It is easy to imagine in the cultures where there was no clock, a full moon would mark a new beginning and thus, would call for a celebration.

I laid out fairy lights in my balcony and spent more than two hours just sitting with the moon seeing it rise in the sky. Here are a few pictures with Orbit enjoying her full moon ritual.

Exploring paper

This week, I started exploring making on different kinds of paper. I am a paper hoarder and find it hard to part ways with any nice packaging paper but when it comes to drawing, I don’t experiment often. I have been feeling stuck on that for quite a bit and considering only I could get myself out of it, I gathered a few papers around and just starting drawing on them.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

1. Golden cardboard paper is from a bakery used as solid base for pastries.

2. From a sketchbook with a few pages left

3. The packaging of a dress that my brother gifted me (I am the luckiest sister in the world)

4. A butter paper that was in the folds of my dress

I thoroughly loved working with the fragile papers and felt a close connection with my drawing and the medium. I’ll continue this series as much as I can.

Reading

I am still reading Lust for Life (1934) a biographical novel written by Irving Stone about the life of the famous Dutch painter Vincent van Gogh and his life and work. The book is a gorgeous biography and I also created a few pages of art journals based on the quotes in the book (which would have been taken directly from Van Gogh’s letters) and will write a separate post on the book when I am finished with it. Reading a book published in 1934 is a fascinating journey into that time and it helps to see what was acceptable during that time.

It does get easy to drown in the cultural artefacts of today, especially when it comes to reading choices but I’ve had a great time reading books that were published before I was born.

In the spirit of Vincent, listen to Starry Starry Night on Youtube :)

Listening

It had been some time that I heard the podcast ‘Art For Your Ears’ by the Jealous Curator. This week, I heard Danielle talking to Petah Coyen. Her work is big, bold and gorgeous and what I loooved hearing from an established artist was her journey. She tells about years and years where she was making bad art and how it was a battle of time with her full time job and her art.

I am going to have to hear that episode once again and make an attention map out of it. It was pure gold!

I’ll leave you with the four of the five panels I drew a while back.

Thanks for reading! Hope you have a lovely week :)

About the ‘From the Studio’

This is a letter that I intend to publish every Sunday. My wish is not only to look backwards in reflection but to use the reflection as a guiding principle for the next week. I am impacted by influences every moment of the day — literature, spoken word, cinema, fellow humans and my work. I am hoping to use this space as the vessel to share all the beauty I found in the world that week.

From the studio: The week of intention

I started 2020 with a big resolve and ambition. To not overthink and just create indiscriminately. At the beginning of the year, I was able to blog for 15 odd days when the reality of Covid hit all of us — indiscriminately.

For the longest part of the initial months of lockdown, I was turbocharged into the black hole of domestic work and just trying to survive with my cooking. I saw with my eyes, dust settling in crevices that I turned a blind eye to, some cob webs getting larger and small hillocks of dishes and unironed clothes got bigger.

Now, it is almost the end of this year and I wanted to pick up the pieces again and hobble along.

This is what happened in the studio this week:

• My endometriosis flared up along with a continuation of the flu. I got tested for Covid-19 and while the test came negative, the healthcare worker conducting the test drove the swab so deep that it hit a nerve behind my eye and there was an additional eye to nurse along with my broken body. It was difficult sitting down for more than 20 minutes at a stretch, it was difficult walking, back and knee were sore and my spirits were really rock bottom.

  Its when I am completely down and about, there wakes up a part of me that wants to rebel against my own body. I usually crash early and wake up early and head straight to the studio table. This collage is a product of that rebellion.

• Watched HillBilly Elegy - a movie based on a book I wanted to read but just didn’t get the time. The performances shook me and I did move back and forth from my childhood to the present moment.

• Also binged on Dash and Lily. Am I ashamed of binging on teenage romance? Never!

• I have been reading Lust for Life, a biographical novel written in 1934 by Irving Stone on the life of Vincent Van Gogh. I have a very battered copy of it and some of the pages keep jumping out of the binding no matter how delicately I handle the book. I find the writing lucid and find it hard to not daydream about the time when Vincent wasn’t the most famous Van Gogh.

• This week, I worked on an original drawing of an attention map made with my own words. After drawing a lot with other (wiser) people’s words, writing my own was fun.

• To end, I am attaching a few pictures of another sketchbook where I spent most of 21st November with.

About the ‘From the Studio’

This is a letter that I intend to publish every Sunday. My wish is not only to look backwards in reflection but to use the reflection as a guiding principle for the next week. I am impacted by influences every moment of the day — literature, spoken word, cinema, fellow humans and my work. I am hoping to use this space as the vessel to share all the beauty I found in the world that week.

Days 20-31: Being in the belly of the whale

Every day, at 9 PM sharp, my feet start losing sensation and my hands start losing any will to work. In the last ten days, I have carried on, absorbing my own chaos and matching it with the world’s.

Suddenly, April looks dangerously different. Suddenly, life looks dangerously precarious.

I read this piece by Dan Albergotti

Things to do in the belly of the whale

Measure the walls. Count the ribs. Notch the long days.
Look up for blue sky through the spout. Make small fires
with the broken hulls of fishing boats. Practice smoke signals.
Call old friends, and listen for echoes of distant voices.
Organize your calendar. Dream of the beach. Look each way
for the dim glow of light. Work on your reports. Review
each of your life's ten million choices. Endure moments
of self-loathing. Find the evidence of those before you.
Destroy it. Try to be very quiet, and listen for the sound
of gears and moving water. Listen for the sound of your heart.
Be thankful that you are here, swallowed with all hope,
where you can rest and wait. Be nostalgic. Think of all
the things you did and could have done. Remember
treading water in the center of the still night sea, your toes
pointing again and again down, down into the black depths.

"Things to Do in the Belly of the Whale" by Dan Albergotti from The Boatloads.© BOA Editions, Ltd., 2008.

I am trying to do everything you said and a little bit more.

Day 11-19 Eight days of looking back at myself

Have you seen Jojo Rabbit?

Elsa, the Jewish girl is hiding in a cupboard. The cupboard is dark and stinky. She is separated from her family and her love. Perhaps, she has lost her family and with the spite and anger diverted at her community, she is living through a loss that is almost unimaginably suffocating.

She is but a teenage girl, in the prime of her life and the world around her is crumbling down to pieces she can’t pick and make sense of.

Children assume love to be the default mode of the world around them - their mothers loved them enough to not let them die of negligence and their fathers loved them enough to be around as an additional care taker and this normalcy of feeling, when tested tears to shreds the model of the world they’ve been weaving all along. Hate must literally destroy our cells, I believe. Was it destroying Elsa’s cells too?

When you can’t hold onto anything, what do you hold onto?

Hold onto that thought. Being stuck at home isn’t the best thing to happen for me in the last one week - and in between work, cooking, washing dishes and washing more dishes, I am more irritable and tired as usual. It was surprising when I started looking back at my selfies from two years back.

It seemed a distance of a lifetime had to be crossed between that girl and the woman I am now. I seemed to be holding onto dear life - and barely so. I decided to walk the steps of these two years to meet her again - between today and that day. To hold onto her.

This is how the meeting went.

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize

View fullsize